Typical scenario: My life is crumbling before my eyes. My mittens are lost. The key to my brother's car won't turn. That one line from that one Jack Johnson song is on the tip of my tongue and I can't remember how it goes. There's a crick in my back. The oil paintings I have to turn in the next day aren't dry yet.
Who you gonna call? Yahoo Answers. Because not only will you find a diverse assortment of solutions or off-topic rants, you will realize that things could be a lot worse. You will realize that somewhere in the universe is a 15 year old girl who isn't sure how to read her pregnancy test. Or someone who's having trouble uploading their original fan fiction Word doc. Or someone who needs help choosing a new designer iPhone case. Or someone who doesn't have Spellchecker. Each tab that I open feels like a whole new universe that I have yet to explore. Each question I read makes me into a more introspective, curious person.
"What type of music is each zodiac sign good at dancing?"
"Where can i get spice girls lolliepops?"
"What's a good plea to get unbanned from 4chan?"
"Will snow globe collections give you profit in the future?"
"Why oh why do i hate stupid people?"
"How can I get some tumblr followers, possibly overnight?"
"How did my brother become a geek and let himself go?"
"Do rabbits with wings even exist?"
"How long after eating cereal should I wait before drinking soda?"
As Frank Atwood so graciously put it in the last season of The O.C. when he was trying to explain his undying love for Julie Cooper, "We're from the same world." Such is my undying love for Yahoo Answers. I go to Yahoo Answers and I find kindred spirits. I find the questions I didn't even know I wanted to ask.
